Comic Review GO! Heroes Reborn: Remnants

Ooookay. Been a while for both of us.

This time around I am only doing one comic. One lone issue. I read it and I think it deserves a lot of attention. I am going to give everything away about this comic but you should still read it.

HEROES REBORN: REMNANTS
Apparently Marvel took all its superheroes from earth 616 and threw them on another earth that was just the imagination a little boy. Then some bad guy came around and said “Hey. You go home or I’ll kill everything.” So all the heroes went home. Sounds stupid right? That’s why no on bought Heroes Reborn. Remnants, the sequel, starts after the heroes leave and earth has no heroes anymore. So a bunch of no talent schmucks become heroes and go off to fight this guy who’s goin’ around actin’ all murdery.
We have:
Mant. (Short for Mantis I think) The janitor for Ant-Man. When he realized that Ant-Man wasn’t coming back to work (and for some strange reason left a shrink helmet) he decided to put it on and fight crime.
Panther Cub. Some kid found an old Black Panther costume and fights crime in it. Problem? He’s like 12. The suit is twice as big as him. Also he’s a dick.
Sterling. My second favorite character in this. He’s a horny bugger who got the Silver Surfer’s residual power. Man the heroes left a lot around.
Amazo-Maxi-Woman. The Ultimate Adaptoid (before your time kids) gained sentience and became a ditzy chick. Super hot android quota is filled.
Miss Thing. Pissed of and sexually frustrated hot chick. Apparently she killed Wolverine with a rock (which is the weirdest thing in the issue seeing as she has no powers and Wolvie can’t be killed like that) and duct taped parts of his skeleton to her body… OOoooKay then…

The first thing we see is the team posing for a press release stating that, yes, the are heroes, as pitiful as they maybe. They then get a call on the Hotline (which is a singing Elvis phone) and meet up with a strange Nick Fury wannabe. He tells them that someone put Groucho glasses on the sphinx. Oh and killed a couple hundred men and stole a hellicarrier. Who could’ve done such a thing? Their mentor and all around Last-hero-left-from-the-Avengers, DEADPOOL! Apparently he was this straight-laced version of Deadpool who loved peace and meditation and he actually organized the Remnants. Then, during an afternoons meditation (trying to pick a good team name) he reaches Nirvana and learns that this reality is just the figment of a child’s imagination. This sends him off the deep end and becomes more of the Deadpool we love.
During a rather short and anti-climatic battle with DP’s henchman, the Remnants meet their old teacher… And find out he’s freaking huge. Seriously fat. (Which isn’t possible because of his ubermetabolism but hey) Also he has a little kid for a sidekick. Personally, I think that is great. He’s corrupting a youth so thoroughly and appears to enjoy it as much as I hoped.

Oh and Deadpool has hundreds of nukes on the hellicarrier and is ready to use him. The Remnants scream “NO!” and then proceed to argue (and make sexual comments) amongst themselves. Deadpool hits the launch button when they say no but doesn’t tell them until they start paying attention. (“[You] shouldn’t keep a supervillain with ADD waiting.”) A fat Deadpool with a cowboy hat is seen riding a missile and Miss Thing comments about how the imagery turns her on. Then we cut to the Watcher who comments that every universe has to have a Deadpool and that they always seem to do this. Then he makes a gesture to DP and the missiles as the whole moon is covered with nukes. The Remnants are on earth and watching this happen in a daze. Mant asks if anyone knows how to sew up the universe to fix the tear DP has created. The end.

Now, I’ve talked more about Deadpool than anything in this review and there are two reasons. One: I love Deadpool. Two: This issues doesn’t really seem to be about the Remnants too much. I mean Deadpool get’s more backstory then these rejects. I’m sure the next issues (if there are any. I’m having trouble finding info on that) contain more about the Remnants. But they just weren’t that interesting this time around. I’d like to read more and will update you if I find any.
I applaud Marvel on giving this a shot. The whole idea is pretty good and works well as the set up for the Remnants. I like loser hero teams. The GLI comes to mind. But this idea is great. It’s nice to go to another reality like this occasionally and thrust some new faces instead of just retelling hero stories and adding new powers. The humor in this comic Is pretty good and is definitely more for an older audience with all the sexual commenting and the references to things the younger audiences wouldn’t get (the UltraAdaptoid). I say if you see it, pick it up. The art is good and the story is great and the little things like how Mant has huge buck teeth really make this item worth it. Plus it has Deadpool. I, Lottel, rate this a Stand Up Comic. (cue rimshot)